Noises and silence , winter adjustments being alone in Eldora .


Ok we all like silence , but do really know what silence really is ?
There seems very little true places to go where there is no noise and would that be strange or ok?
We go walking on a soft snowy path ..crunch , crunch , squeak from your boots , ur own breathing has a sound , yet we embrace it as silence.
U sit next to a wood stove that has a constant slight roar of the wood burning, sometimes sap, bark popping , hissing yet we say we are surrounded by silence .
The water pipes drip in the background, a clock ticks , ears ring , heaters turn on , houses creak from the wind , refrigerators turn on and off. Yet we think this is silence .
Is it getting away from human noises that we are looking for when we want silence ? Or do we want some noise that reassure us we are not really alone.
Does that mean we accept the other man made noises , like wood stoves noises and drips and heaters and skis sliding on snow , water sounds from water features or waves crashing on the shore a after a boat goes by , our feet moving on carpets as not noise ?
After friends and neighbors and family leave and i am alone w myself , no pets , no music , no tapping from my fingers on my ipad , possible no heater turning on.. i try to stop listening and find silence but i cant help hear everything and decipher it .
For me silence is no car sounds, no people or dog sounds nor planes , jets , helicopters , no motor sounds from appliances and equipment.
Sounds from nature are not noise . Sure howling wind bashing over and around my house seems loud and scary but I would trade that for motorized sounds or the constant chatter from videos or music.
So is there really silence , where would that be? Does silence exist ?
once in awhile in middle of the nite , i wake up to nothing. too far from the busy kitchen sounds and the heater is quiet , the wind or snow is not blowing , my clock is out of sound range and yes if i keep still , breath softly it is as near silent .. as close as it has ever been and i am not sure If its or not ok quite yet.
It registers loneliness right now to me.
I want to hear another breathing sometime not jus mine . The rustling of sheet s and blankets being moved .
But true silence would be scary . is that what the deaf hears ? Silence sounds lifeless.


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